I am so depressed right now. I feel like a part of me has died. It hurts just to breath. I recently found out that the one who got away is now engaged to be married. I feel like my world has fallen apart. I always had high hopes that things would come back in a circle and things would work out, but apparently not. Neither one of us was to blame really. It was just really bad timing and we were taking different paths in our lives. So fuck letting the one that you love go and seeing if he comes back because he didn’t come back! LOL. I still have fond memories, but I’m very heartbroken. He was close to perfection. I don’t know who else could have been closer to meeting all of my expectations when it comes to a potential mate. Ugh. I know if I ever bumped into him or see him, I wouldn’t be able to hold the tears back. I’m devastated. I’m having a lot of mixed emotions right now. It sucks the most knowing that I could’ve been the one for him and he could’ve of been the one for me if only the timing was right. If only I’d met him later on in life. When he went overseas, my friends encouraged me to go with him and now that I think back, I should have. It would have been a huge risk, but it would have been worth it and I probably wouldn’t be regretting it right now. I didn’t go because I had my life here and I was trying to finish up school. I know that some believe that in this world, you have more than just one soulmate, but I feel as though he was the one, the only one for me and I let him slip in between my fingers. He was my everything. I don’t know if I have any other soulmates out there that I haven’t met. All of the guys that I’ve dated after him have not even come close to what he was. :o( I’m sorry, I can’t talk about him anymore. It’s making me go crazy and I get all teary eyed thinking about it. I know I can keep my mind busy so I don’t think about him, but when I go to sleep, I won’t have any control over that. He’ll show up in my dreams. At least I’ll get to see him again.
